The Harried Life of the Working Mother

The PEW Research Center released a report today, The Harried Life of the Working Mother, discussing the competing roles mothers play at work and home.

Women now make up almost half of the U.S. labor force, up from 38% in 1970. This nearly forty-year trend has been fueled by a broad public consensus about the changing role of women in society. A solid majority of Americans (75%) reject the idea that women should return to their traditional roles in society, and most believe that both husband and wife should contribute to the family income.

Working Mother Magazine and Flex-Time Lawyers Rates the Top 50 Law Firms for Women

Working Mother Magazine and Flex-Time Lawyers recently released its list of the top 50 law firms for women.  The firms "were evaluated on their workforce profile, family-friendly benefits and policies, flexibility, leadership, compensation, and their advancement and retention of women, among other factors."

The firms that made the top 50 have "more lawyers working reduced hours (8 percent versus 5 percent nationwide) and also employ more female equity partners, who share in their firm’s profits (20 percent versus 16 percent nationwide)."  To view the complete list of the Top 50 firms, click here.

Scaling Back Career for Baby

In a recent post on her New York Times' Motherlode blog, Lisa Belkin turned a question she received over to her readers. Here's a snippet of Anna's letter to the readers:

I used to secretly look down on stay-at-home moms. I’m not proud of being so judgmental, but opting out seemed like the easy road to me, an excuse to avoid the 9-to-5. If I asked someone I just met at a party what she did for a living and her answer was “I stay at home with the kids,” I’d mentally check out of the conversation. Surely I had nothing in common with this person....Then my husband and I decided to have a baby.

...I returned to work last week, and I already feel like I am missing so much at home. When I lock eyes with my daughter during a feeding or rock her to sleep in the glider, it feels right — like this is what I was born to do. I know it’s not logical or even true, but I feel like I am the only one in the world who can take care of her properly...

What is the right thing for me to do?

Almost 400 readers responded in the comments, including some attorneys. The dialogue is quite interesting with a wide range of advice, opinions, and thoughts for Anna--and for any of us who have faced returning to work, leaving a new baby at home.

Part-Time Partners

According to Part-time Partners: How Women Lawyers are Reaching Greater Heights with Fewer Billable Hours, a feature in this month's edition of Working Mother Magazine, law firms are increasingly offering partnerships to reduced-hour lawyers. 

Pamela Miller, an equity partner at Arnold & Porter and mother of two, works a reduced hour schedule, making time for soccer games and school conferences. 

“I don’t believe in apologizing for the fact that I’m a working mother,” says the 38-year-old equity partner in Arnold & Porter’s litigation practice. “If I send out an email about things going on at home, people will get a mixed message about whether or not I’m available. I use technology to the greatest impact to be available. Sometimes it means taking a call from a soccer field instead of the office.”

7 Truths that Every Working Woman Should Know Before Having a Child -- Part VII

Finally, the 7th and final installation of the series that I started many months ago and haven't been able to bring myself to finish.  Way back in November, I promised to tell you the truth about the seven things that I wished I would have known about being a mom -- information that I thought would be helpful to professional women that are not yet moms but are contemplating starting a family.

I hope that my series was information and helpful, even if it was personal and only one girl's opinion and advice.  (I've put links to the other six posts below.)

The thing that I promised to write about last was: "You'll be the Same Person But Now You'll Just Have a Kid".  I've been putting this off because, well, the myth is self-explanatory.  However, with a lot of thought I think I have nailed the reason why this is a myth -- besides the obvious reaons like how could you possibly be the same person if you are only getting sleep in 1.5 hour increments or painting you two-year old daughter's toe nails with peel-off polish instead of getting a pedicure of your own in your free 30 minutes on a Saturday afternoon!  The truth to counter this myth is that the center of your life changes when you have a child...

Five Tips for Commuting While Pregnant (and Afterward)

If you missed it, on Friday the Wall Street Journal Juggle blog asked readers to comment on commuting while pregnant. What resulted was a long, long thread of horror stories (from pregnant women forced to stand for long subway rides while fellow passengers feigned sleep) punctuated with a few friendlier tales and lot of people admonishing each other to be more courteous. If you are looking for commiseration, head to the Juggle blog. If you are looking for solutions, just scroll down! I read through the thread to glean tips for Ms. JD readers.

Five tips for commuting while pregnant (and afterward):

1. Carry plenty of plastic bags. The smells on the subway can set off your morning sickness like nothing else. And even if you have a car service, you might need them.

2. Don't be afraid to stare people down on the subway, rubbing your pregnant belly and looking as pathetic as possible. It may be the only way you get a seat.

3. Don't hesitate to politely say, "Excuse me, I'm pregnant. May I share this seat?" A number of passengers explained that they don't want to assume a woman is pregnant and risk insulting her by offering up a seat if she's merely overweight.

4. Use the benches reserved for handicapped and elderly passengers. Those are for you, too. If you feel shy about asking for a seat, know that you're even more in the right to ask for one of these.

The middle three tips all apply after the baby is born, too, when you're carrying a babe-in-arms. Or a babe-in-stroller, as it were. Which brings me to the last tip...

5. Shop carefully for a stroller that folds up compactly. Many passengers complained about deluxe, monster strollers that block subway aisles. After you have the baby, you will obviously have to make your own judgments about what you need. If you can find a more compact stroller, though (or ask for one as a baby shower gift), you may be better off--and find your fellow travelers a little friendlier.

Got any more tips? Leave 'em in the comments. Happy commuting!