By Crystal Elaine Ellison • December 31, 2020•Writers in Residence
Welcome to my final blog for Writers in Residence of 2020! I did it! As my Writers in Residence blog comes to an end, I can’t be prouder of myself. I stepped out of my comfort zone and blogged! I’m officially a blogger. Correction: a Ms. JD blogger. I have truly enjoyed this journey and I love my Ms. JD family!
I have shared with you how I juggle wearing many hats, how it affects my daily life and how my A-type personality can be both a blessing and a curse. I have shared some of my personal experiences regarding my struggles and successes with being multifaceted. My goal was to share my personal experiences because as an attorney, our lives can be very different from what social media or television depicts. I wanted to share with you the raw, uncut, truth, version. Being an attorney is hard work. It’s even more difficult being a double minority (black-female). Sometimes I question why I became an attorney in the first place if the laws weren’t designed to protect us. I’m then reminded of how many people fought for me to be in this position.
Throughout this pandemic, I have suppressed feelings, given people second, third and fourth chances, placed others before myself – basically more things than I can count that were probably unhealthy. I knew, but didn’t want to realize, it all came with a price.
Don’t get me wrong, I encourage forgiving those who have wronged you and giving people another chance. But, when your kindness is taken for weakness and your forgiveness is taken for granted, it’s probably time to throw in the tile and keep it moving. I would say that 2020 was catastrophic - but it didn’t come without blessings. Did you know that a blessing can come in the form of immediate disappointment? Some blessings are not obvious on the outset. Don’t become weary by disappointment, God always has a reason for everything that he does. Don’t suppress your feelings. There are plenty of awesome therapist, pastors, friends, that are willing and able to help guide you. If I’ve learned anything from the year 2020, I have to put myself first so that I'm able to help others.
As I walk into 2021, with my head held high, I will stand proud, grateful and humble for the things I prayed for and didn’t receive and for everything that I have. I can’t dwell on disappointments but I can rest assured that greater is coming. There is no time to look back – onward.
“Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer” Romans 12:12