By Susan Smith Blakely • May 15, 2019•Careers, Other Career Issues
I have just returned from a reunion with 14 of my college girlfriends. We get together as often as possible --- traveling from both coasts and points in between --- to make sure that our friendships remain kindled and that we provide support to one another as our journeys through life ebb and flow. These times together never disappoint, and we always leave planning the next one.
This is my way of reminding you that I am and always have been an advocate for women, dating back to college when we all needed each other's support dealing with our new-found independence and all it entailed. However, along my road from law school to law practice, I have encountered women, who have tried hard to undermine me and negatively affect my professional progress. And I am not alone. I have heard similar stories from many of my female colleagues, and I have witnessed this kind of negative behavior among women professionals.
That is why I remind women lawyers as often as possible of the words of former Secretary of State Madeleine Albright when she said, "There is a place in HELL reserved for women who do not support other women." I have met Secretary Albright and discussed those words with her in the context of women lawyers. As the mother of women lawyers, she was a quick convert to the cause.
However, recognizing that some women do not treat other women well does not mean that I buy into all of the women bullying women stereotypes. I know too many wonderful and supportive women lawyers to ever go down that road. But others have, and it is a slippery slope.
In a recent blog from my friend Andie Kramer and her husband Al Harris, whose Andie and Al blog series addresses issues like gender bias that affect women in the workplace, it was not at all surprising to find Andie taking on other authors on the subject of women's bias against other women. Andie is a great supporter of women, and she is a contributor to two of my books in the effort to improve conditions for women lawyers. The fact that she refuses to buy into alleged female stereotypes about women victimizing other women was predictable, and she does it so well.
Rather than rely on negative messages about the societal or evolutionary or internal antagonism behind distinctive female characteristics of hostility by women against women, Andie and Al challenge those assumptions and beliefs by focusing on what they believe is the real cause for negative behaviors in the workplace ---- the workplace itself.
Here is a sampling of what you will read in the blog:
Women’s and men’s behaviors depend not on distinctive female or male characteristics but on the situations in which they find themselves: what they are asked to do, the conditions under which they are required to do it, and the expectations of how they will perform while doing it. Women’s difficulties with other women in the workplace have little or nothing to do with women’s evolution, socialization, or internalized misogyny. They have everything to do with the dynamics of the environments within which women are working. In other words, it’s not the women, it’s their workplaces.
Women helping women and eliminating the toxicity of legal work spaces are major themes of the Best Friends at the Bar project. I hope that you will join me in these efforts and that you also will keep up with the Andie and Al on their website to gain perspective on gender bias and related issues. And I am sure that their new book on these subjects will be illuminating for all of us.
Susan Smith Blakely is the Founder of LegalPerspectives LLC and an award-winning, nationally-recognized author, speaker and consultant on issues related to young women lawyers, young women law students and young women interested in careers in the law. She is author of Best Friends at the Bar: What Women Need to Know about a Career in the Law (Wolters Kluwer/Aspen Publishers 2009), and Best Friends at the Bar: The New Balance for Today's Woman Lawyer (Wolters Kluwer Law & Business 2012), which addresses the work-life struggle for women lawyers and includes twelve profiles of women who have successfully transitioned from one practice setting to another. Her third book in the series, Best Friends at the Bar: Top-Down Leadership for Women Lawyers, focuses on the responsibilities of law firm leaders and was released by Wolters Kluwer Law & Business in 2015.
Ms. Blakely’s new book for ALL young lawyers, What Millennial Lawyers Want: A Bridge from the Past to the Future of Law Practice, will be released by Wolters Kluwer/Aspen Publishers in the summer of 2018.
Ms. Blakely frequently speaks at colleges and universities, law schools, law firms and law organizations, and she has been featured in media including Corporate Counsel Magazine, the ABA Journal, the LA Daily Journal, National Jurist, Washington Examiner Newspaper, Forbes Woman, Women Lawyers Journal (NAWL), DC Spotlight, Lawyerist.com, Daily Muse, Lawyer and Statesman, Law.com, Georgetown Law Magazine, Legal Toolkit Podcast, and Huffington Post Business. Ms. Blakely also is a frequent guest speaker and panelist at conferences on women's issues in business and the law profession, and she has been a featured speaker at the US Department of Justice, Civil Division. She is the recipient of the Ms. JD 2015 "Sharing Her Passion Award" and the Lawyer Monthly “Women in Law Award 2016”for her work on behalf of women in the law.
Ms. Blakely graduated from the University of Wisconsin with distinction and from Georgetown University Law Center where she was a teaching fellow. She is a member of the CoachSource global network of leadership coaches and is certified as a career coach for the Indiana University Marshall Goldsmith Leadership Development and Executive Coaching Academy. For more information, please visit www.bestfriendsatthebar.com.