From Goal Ghosting to Goal Crushing: A Millennial’s Step-by-Step Plan for Creating and Achieving Your Goals

How are your goals going so far this year? If you’re crushing it, kudos to you, go-getter! But if January has felt like one big Monday and you’ve already stumbled, you’re not alone. By the second week of January—infamously dubbed "Quitters Week"—most people abandon their New Year’s resolutions.

The truth is that goals aren’t just hard to achieve—they’re also hard to set. If you’ve read my previous post on designing your best year yet and completed the journaling prompts, you’ve already reflected on 2024’s lessons and blessings. You’ve also created a clear vision of who you want your future self to be in 2025. That reflection was a powerful first step where you honored your growth and set your sights on what’s next. Now, it’s time to take that foundation and go deeper by turning your intention into action.  

This month, I wrap up the lesson on goals by going into the specifics of goal setting. Why am I so passionate about teaching you how to set and achieve goals right now? Because the world around us is changing in ways that demand we rise to the occasion. Whether at work, in school, in our communities, or at home, the time has come for us to evolve into the kind of leaders this moment requires. 

Your goals matter because they help you grow and live a life that aligns with your values and aspirations. When you show up as your most empowered self, you’re not just impacting the world around you—you’re honoring the person you’re meant to be. Now more than ever, your dreams are worth fighting for, and so are you. It’s not too late to make progress on your goals. And the process doesn’t have to be stressful. There’s a better way to approach goals than we’ve been taught—one that provides clarity, removes unnecessary pressure, and helps you enjoy the journey. In this post, I’ll show you exactly how to do it.

Step 1: Vision Mapping: Plotting Your Glow Up

Start with some intentional dreaming: if you could have more of something this year, what would it be? Picture yourself at the end of 2025—what does your heart truly desire? Forget about what’s expected of you and focus on what genuinely matters to you. Maybe it’s building self-confidence at work, creating a strong mentorship network, or prioritizing self-care as a lawyer or law school student.

If you’re feeling stuck, check out Step 3 of last month’s post. The prompts there are designed to help you clarify what you truly want for your future.

Once you’ve identified your desires, narrow them down to three core priorities. These should reflect the areas of your life you want to optimize most this year (or at least prioritize in this quarter). Then, create goals that align with each priority. Here are some examples to get you started: 

• If your priority is building confidence at work, your goal might be to speak up at meetings or take on a leadership role.

• If you’re focused on expanding your mentor network, you might set a goal to attend monthly networking events to meet new potential mentors, or reconnect with existing ones to strengthen your relationships.

• If self-care is one of your priorities, you can aim to establish better work-life boundaries or commit to a weekly wellness activity that brings you joy.

Recap: Start by dreaming big, narrow it down to three core priorities, and create general goals that align with those priorities.

Step 2: Set SMARTER Goals: Your Brain’s New Favorite GPS

Most of us set ourselves up for failure by creating vague or unrealistic goals. And honestly, it’s not entirely our fault. We’ve been socialized to dream big and told we can achieve anything we want, but rarely taught how to actually break those big dreams into actionable steps we can follow.

Sure, many of us have achieved ambitious goals before, even without a specific framework. We leaned into our ambition and just powered through. But how efficient and enjoyable was the process? Did you really savor the magnitude of your success, or were you so exhausted by the time you crossed the finish line that you barely noticed it?

Let me share one of my biggest coaching secrets: when you set specific, measurable goals and track your progress, you create undeniable proof of your hard work and growth (think daily progress selfies, but for your goals!). This powerful feedback loop fuels your confidence, keeps you motivated, and turns fulfillment into a natural byproduct of your journey. 

The best framework I’ve found for setting goals is Michael Hyatt’s “SMARTER” goals method. It’s an upgrade from the traditional “SMART” method because it adds elements that help you tap into deeper motivation and long-term sustainability. Think of SMARTER goals as a GPS for your brain, guiding you with clarity, precision, and the fuel to actually enjoy the journey while achieving results you didn’t think were possible.

Let’s use an example: Imagine you’re a law school student or a young associate at a law firm, and your goal is to be more confident when speaking up in class or meetings. Here’s how you could apply the SMARTER framework:

Specific:
Instead of saying, “I want to be more confident,” define exactly what that looks like. For example, “I will contribute at least one comment or ask a question in every class session,” or “I will present one idea or strategy in every team meeting.” 

Being specific helps eliminate the wiggle room where doubts creep in because you know exactly what you’re working toward.

Measurable:
How will you know you’re making progress on your goal? For example, you can track how often you speak up in class or meetings each week. Use a simple tally on your calendar to note your wins or use a habit tracker like Atoms (my personal favorite) to gamify your progress, make it more visual and more fun. 

Seeing evidence of your growth is like giving your brain a gold star (yay!).

Actionable:
Focus on the next steps you need to take. Don’t overcomplicate it. Take five to ten minutes to map out the first few steps you need to get started. No fancy tools required, just pen and paper. Maybe it’s preparing key points or questions before each class or meeting. If nerves are the issue, practice your delivery in front of the mirror (or your pet) until it feels natural. Or, consider hiring a coach to sharpen your communication skills and executive presence. 

Action creates traction. You’re not just wishing for confidence—you’re building it, step by step.

Risky:
Push yourself outside your comfort zone just enough to feel a little nervous, but not so much that you’re paralyzed. For instance, if you’re comfortable answering easy questions in class, challenge yourself to tackle a tougher, more analytical one. Or volunteer to present a key point in a meeting where senior partners are present. It’s nerve-wracking but will demonstrate your initiative and expertise.  

Yes, you will feel butterflies in your stomach, but that means that you are doing something that really matters to you.  

Time-Bound:
Set a deadline to build momentum. For example, “By the end of this semester…” or “By the end of the quarter…” 

Deadlines create urgency and keep you from falling into the “I’ll start tomorrow” trap.

Exciting: 

Tie your goal to your “Why” or core values. This is the fuel that will keep you going when (not if) things get tough. Why do you want to build confidence? Is it to earn respect? To feel more prepared? To better serve your clients? Or maybe it’s to make a strong impression at work so you can confidently negotiate that well-deserved salary bump. 

When your goal is rooted in what truly matters to you, it stops feeling like just another task and starts feeling like a step toward living your purpose.

Relevant:
Make sure your goal fits your current season of life, and aligns with your other goals. If finals are looming and your stress levels are already at code red, start small like contributing in one class per week, then build up when you have more mental bandwidth. Also, don't let this goal clash with your bigger aspirations. 

Your goals should work together like a well-matched legal team, not be at odds like opposing counsel.

Lastly, and most importantly, write down your goals and review them often—daily if you can. Research shows that writing down your goals dramatically increases your chances of achieving them. Legendary achievers like Brian Tracy, Tony Robbins, and more swear by the power of frequent goal review to fuel their success. This simple practice keeps your goals top of mind, strengthens your commitment, and trains your brain to focus on what truly matters, turning intention into unstoppable action.

Recap: Turn your general goals into written SMARTER ones (Specific, Measurable, Actionable, Risky, Time-Bound, Exciting, and Relevant) that you review often for laser focus and major momentum.

Step 3: Make Your Mindset Your MVP

One of the biggest patterns I’ve noticed in my coaching clients is that success often comes down to belief. Do you truly believe you can achieve your goals? If the answer is “not really” or “not yet,” don’t panic. Start by believing this one simple truth: you can figure it out. You don’t need all the answers right now, and you certainly don’t need to be perfect. The magic happens when you take imperfect action and learn by doing.

Negative thoughts will come (my brain is sooo good at offering up worst-case scenarios). That’s okay—our brains are just trying to keep us safe. The trick is to challenge those thoughts and replace them with something more helpful. For example, instead of thinking, “I’m terrible at speaking up,” try this: “I’m becoming the kind of person who can confidently contribute, one step at a time.”

Michael Hyatt calls this process reframing “limiting beliefs” into “liberating truths,” and it’s a true game-changer.

Recap: Your belief in yourself is the foundation of success. Reframe those limiting beliefs into liberating truths, and watch your confidence flourish.

Step 4: Failure, Learn, Repeat: Embrace the Failure with Optimism

Failure is not the opposite of success—it’s a necessary part of the process. The value of a goal lies in the growth it creates for you. Keep the following in mind: 

• Redefine “Consistency:” It’s not about perfection and achieving 100% on your streaks; it’s about showing up more often than not so that you are simply getting better than you were before. The only “goal police” are the imaginary ones in your head! Focus on the joy and value you get from doing the thing—not on maintaining a perfect streak. What’s the value of consistency for consistency’s sake if you’re not enjoying the journey?  

• Learn from Setbacks: Every stumble holds valuable data. If you didn’t speak up in that meeting you planned to, don’t spiral into a self-judgement abyss—get curious instead. Ask yourself, “What held me back? What can I do differently next time?” Adjust, adapt, and keep moving forward. Every single misstep is a lesson that holds valuable data for your growth, and certainly not a reflection of your worth.

• Celebrate ALL Progress: Small wins add up to big results, so don’t skip the celebration! (Check out my article on the secret to unshakable confidence for women of color in law.) Slow progress is still progress, and every time you celebrate, your brain gets a dopamine hit. That “feel-good” moment tells your brain it’s safe—and even rewarding—to take risks and keep working toward that goal.

Recap: Consistency is about just showing up better than before, not perfection. View failure as valuable feedback, and celebrate every step forward. Letting go of perfectionism makes the journey both more enjoyable and more likely to succeed.

Here’s the white hot truth: setting and achieving goals isn’t just about checking things off a list. It’s about becoming the person you want to be and living the life you truly value and enjoy.

When you take the time to map out your vision, set SMARTER goals, get your mindset right, and embrace failure as part of the process, you create a roadmap that’s not just effective—it’s fulfilling. 

So, here’s your call to action:

Dream boldly. Don’t be afraid to envision a future that excites you.

Plan strategically. Use the SMARTER framework to turn those dreams into written, actionable steps that you review frequently.

Believe in yourself. Believe in your ability to figure things out as you go.

Learn to love the fails. Every step forward and backward can be progress.  

This year don’t ghost your goals—crush them. Laugh at the messy missteps, celebrate the wins, and remember: progress isn’t perfect, but it’s always worth it.

Sara Santoyo is on a mission to diversify the field of law, one woman of color at a time. As a first-gen attorney who passed the hardest bar exam in the nation and who overcame the barriers she faced as a WOC in law to land her dream attorney role, she developed the skills and confidence that comes from knowing that she can turn any adversity into an advantage. Sara now devotes her professional life to coaching young WOC lawyers to do the same and more.